Meeting Luka

We arrived in Warsaw exhausted.  Grace met us at the airport.  She was much different than expected--a shorter dark haired woman in her 40s or early 50s.  I guess I expected an older, blonde woman.  I have no idea why.  We immediately drove to Lomza; almost a three hour drive.  Through Warsaw and the surround countryside.  Very thick woods on either side.  I could easily imagine Polish soldiers and citizens fighting and hiding for their survival in those woods during the many harsh times this country has seen.

We were so tired both of us nodded off throughout the ride.  I tried to stay awake so hard but many times jolted up after realizing I had been asleep.  I haven't been that tired in years.  We arrived at the hotel around 3:30 p.m.  The hotel was lovely; nothing fancy but nice and comes with great wireless and fantastic breakfast. Beautiful pond area out back and the restaurant has great ambience and even better Polish food.  We definitely recommend it to anyone traveling north of Warsaw in Poland.

Here are some photos of the hotel, food and back area.  These are not the best photos but I am having a problem uploading from my phone to the computer.

My first perogies! Yum! 

Hungarian soup and Zubr, a local beer.

View out our window at 4:00 A.M.!

Anyway, we woke up around 3:30 a.m. on Friday (Poland time).  I think the time difference was still with us.  I was nervous but Matt said he wasn't, "What is there to be nervous about?"

Grace picked us up and served as our interpreter at the Adoption Center.  We were told there was another record from Luka's cleft surgery in November that would be translated and that it was important as his cleft palate will need revision.  This was a surprise to us but when we met Luka we understood that it was because as he is growing the right side of is face is not so his palate will continue to need repair.  We were also informed that on Monday we will meet the surgeon and the social worker who has legal custody of Luka.

Grace, and therefore we, were under the impression that after meeting with the psychologist at the center, we would go to Luka's foster home.  The Adoption Center psychologist told us among many other things that in Poland they do not believe it is good for the child to maintain contact with the foster family because it will be harder for them to attach to the adoptive parents.  She said she knows this is different than in the United States.  I think this is terrible for a child; to cute them off suddenly from the people they have come to love and trust to care for them.  However, it is there rule and I told her that I was glad she told me because we had planned to exchange contact info with them.

About half an hour after we arrived, the foster parents showed up with Luka.  It was clear that he is/was very loved by the foster parents.  His foster father took off work to come and they brought everything they owned for Luka to give to us.  It was clear his foster mom very much wanted Luka to have all of his things so we agreed, gratefully.  We had brought with us to the hotel all the clothes and toys we thought we would need and I felt terrible taking all of these baby things since it would be likely that they have another foster child placed with them but we did not want to hurt them anymore than they already were.

It was obvious from the care they gave Luka at the Center that they loved him deeply.  Luka had only been with them about 5 weeks after leaving the residential medical facility (mental institution/orphanage) and they knew at that time that parents had been selected for him but they were clearly in love with him. Which is so good because Luka's experience with them as one on one loving caretakers and (hopefully) his ability to love them will mean he will have the ability to attach to and love us as well.

Luka's foster mom, told me everything she could think of about his care and watched over me as I fed him some yogurt.  The foster father brought a very expensive and professional looking digital camera with lenses and flash to take photos and proudly showed Matt photos of his children (17 and 23 years old) and wife with Luka.  Several times during the meeting, foster father's eyes became red and welling with tears.  And foster mom clearly was on the verge of tears the entire time.

After only an hour, the foster parents abruptly got up to say good by to Luka and leave.  We took photos as they said good-bye.

Matt went to the store with Grace to buy baby food (as if foster mom had not left us enough) and other items for us.  I was left alone at the center's office with Luka.  He was very sweet but more interested in his toys than me.

When Grace and Matt returned we went back to the hotel and have been here with Luka going on walks, playing and getting to know each other ever since.  Grace will pick us up tomorrow to meet the social worker and surgeon and then we will go to Warsaw to the apartment.  Grace did tell us that the Adoption Center psychologist had told her the foster parents had mentioned coming to the hotel this weekend and said that it was not allowed.  Grace told her that she needed to tell them, not her.  We, of course, were open to such a visit but they did not break the rules and did not come.  I can only imagine how hard it would be not knowing how a child you loved was doing.  We will see what the future holds and if it is possible to have contact later--just to reassure them that Luka is loved and receiving the right medical care.

The Adoption Center and many of the individuals who cared for Luka had provided gifts for him. The Center gave him a prayer card signed by Pope John Paul II, a rosary blessed by him,  a large teddy bear,  a disk of photographs and a Polish child's book.  One of the caretakers at the medical center had sent a photo of herself holding Luka and the physical therapist who loved him so much gave him a book of Polish poetry.  Clearly, Luka touched many hearts and they were happy to see him find a home and family.

Wow, that is a very short version of what has happened this weekend but I am still exhausted and must go to sleep.  Below are some photos from the past few days.  More to follow in the next few days.